Take Me Back
Reagan sighed as she gently ran her fingertips over the tiny wrinkles around her eyes; a song from long ago filtering through her brain.
~~She looks in the mirror and stares at the wrinkles, that, weren't there yesterday~ ~
She placed her hands on the vanity and looked at her reflection. Was she really 40 years old? Time hadn't passed that quickly had it? She supposed it had, there were the mileage lines staring back at her in the mirror.
It was hard to believe she had lived in River Run for 14 years now. Her children weren't even babies anymore and so many of those she loved had passed on. God she felt old.
Tony walked up behind her and placed his arms around her, his hands on the vanity next to hers and rested his chin on her shoulder.
"You're still as beautiful as you were the first day I laid eyes on you at the Roadhouse," he said as he looked at her in the mirror.
"You're so full of....."
"Uh uh, now. None of that," he scolded playfully.
"Sorry, I'm not in a very good mood tonight," she replied.
"I noticed you were awfully quiet at the party."
She turned to face him. "Turning 40 stinks. I want to be 26 again and falling in love with you for the first time," she said as her eyes filled with tears.
"Would you really want to relive those first few years again?"
She wiped the stray tear away. "You wouldn't?"
"Reagan, they weren't the best years of our marriage. Why are you so down? Come on, tell me. There's something more bugging you than turning 40."
She shrugged her shoulders. "It's late and I'm tired. I ..I'm sure that's it. I'll wake up tomorrow and be alright," she said as she moved to walk past him.
"You won't wake up feeling better, if what is bugging you is still there, talk to me," he urged.
She looked up into his gray eyes and debated if she should tell him. "You promise you won't take this the wrong way?"
"I promise, just tell me."
"You swear, you won't get mad?"
"I won't get mad."
"You'll get mad."
"Reagan, just tell me," he said, his voice raising slightly.
"See, I knew you would get mad."
He sighed. "I'm not mad. Please tell me what is bothering you."
"Oh, alright. I feel old. Not just old as in 'I turned 40 today', I feel old, because I run my kids to and from school, to band practice, to cheerleading practice, to guitar lessons, to baseball practice. I slop stalls for you, and feed newborn animals, and I clean house, cook meals, pay bills. I...I miss how we were when we were young. The romance, the spontaneity, the moments when it felt like you and I were the only two people in the world. I've been in love with you so long, I've forgotten what it felt like when I fell in love with you," she stated as the tears streamed down her face.
Tony said nothing as he stood there with his arms crossed.
"You're mad. I knew you would be."
He uncrossed his arms and took her hand.
"Where are we going?" she asked.
He led her down the hall into the living room and out the patio doors to the pool.
Candles were lit and music softly played on the stereo. Reagan gasped at the sight.
Tony turned to face her. "Remember when we used to come out here?"
"Oh, Tony," she whispered.
"Aww, now. Don't cry on me."
"I'm sorry. Hank always said I was the weepy sort," she laughed.
"He certainly knew you well."
Tony took her hand and pulled her into his embrace. "Do you rememberthe first time we kissed?" he whispered in her ear.
"Of course. How could I forget?"
"It was at Kirkland Hill, by the...."
"It was not! It was in your living room in the middle of a thunder storm!" she corrected as she looked up at him, his eyes twinkling.
"I know exactly when it was and where it was," he said, his voice low. "I was feeling bad, because we both got drenched but you thought it was fun. I brushed your wet hair away from your eyes. My heart was racing so fast in my chest and it had nothing to do with the sprint we had just made from the barn. I placed my hand just so, behind your neck," he said as he moved his hand. Slowly he moved his face towards hers. "And then our lips met," he whispered as his lips touched hers.
Reagan felt the tingle all the way down to her toes as his lips softly caressed hers.
~Gonna take a sentimental journey
Gonna set my heart at ease
Gonna take a sentimental journey
To renew old memories ~
His lips trailed kisses along her jaw, to her ear.
"You're shivering," he whispered.
"Mmm hmm."
~Got my bag, got my reservation
Spent each dime I could afford
Like a child in wild anticipation
Long to hear that 'All aboard' ~
"Do you remember when you were going to leave and I stopped you at the train station?"
"Stopped me? You grabbed my ticket from me," she said as she smiled up at him.
"Well, I couldn't let you leave me. The conductor had already yelled, 'All aboard.'
~Seven, that's the time we leave at seven I'll be waiting up for heaven Counting every mile
Of railroad track that takes me back ~
"I didn't know if I was going to be able to put you
on that train a few days later. It took everything I had to let you go home and pack things up to move back here," Tony confessed.
"But you came and got me."
"Yes, I did and then I did the smartest thing of my life by marrying you. I know I haven't been a perfect husband and I know I did some pretty stupid things while we've been married. Whenever we were apart, for whatever reason, I wasn't the same."
~Never thought my heart could be so yearny Why did I decide to roam Gotta take that sentimental journey
Sentimental journey home~
"I know, I've been remiss in showing you how much I love you lately and I'm sorry. I wish I knew of some way to make you feel that same rush and excitement that you felt when we first fell in love. God knows you deserve it for putting up with me...."
Reagan put her finger to his lips. "Shh. Stop talking and kiss me."
His hand slid low on her back and pulled her closer to him as his other hand cradled her head. He brought his lips close to hers, almost touching them.
"If this were one of your stories, how would you write it? 'His strong arms encircled her body, her lush lips quivered in anticipation of his kiss. His eyes searched hers, looking for some kind of sign that she loved him and wanted him as much as he wanted her. Then he saw it, the flicker of desire, deep in her eyes. He dipped her body backwards and kissed her," he said as he dramatically dipped her backwards. "Long and hard," he finished.
Reagan couldn't help but laugh.
~~
"Ronnie, Kyle. Wake up. Look out the window," Sarah whispered to her
brothers.
"What?!" Ronnie snapped as he sat up.
"Shh, you ninny. Look at Mom and Dad," she said as she pointed out the boys bedroom window.
"What are they doing?" Kyle asked.
"They're dancing. Isn't it romantic?" she sighed.
"Eww, that's mushy stuff. I'll never do that sort of thing," he groaned.
"You will if you want a girl to fall in love with you.
You'll need all the help you can get," she teased.
"Says you," Ronnie said as he punched her arm.
"Oww!" she cried.
"Shh, they'll hear us," Kyle warned.
The three children leaned their arms against the window sill and rested their chins on them and watched as their mom and dad danced in the moonlight.
When Tony dipped Reagan back all three of them giggled.
~~
Tony's head turned in the direction of the boys room. "Sounds like we
have an audience," he informed her.
She laughed as he stood her upright. "I'll go get the munchkins back in bed," she said as she walked towards the house.
When she got inside, Sarah was already back in her room, faking sleep.
"Faker," Reagan said.
Sarah tried to hide a smile.
Reagan turned and went to the boys room, they too were in their beds, eyes closed, looking for all the world, like two little angels.
Tony walked up behind her. "Faking?"
She looked up at him. "They're very good at it too," she whispered.
"Night boys," Tony said.
"Night, Daddy," Kyle answered.
"Shh," Ronnie said, then looked at his parents with a guilty look on his face.
Reagan shook her head and smiled as she and Tony walked to their room.
He closed the door behind them. "Now, where were we before we were
interrupted?" he asked.
"I think we were at the point where you were going to kiss me, long and hard," she said, smiling.
"Oh, yeah. I remember now," he said as he took her in his arms.
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